Video and music for the scene:
Hear: Silence, breathing
Touch: Your fingers are cold
Feel: as if you are being observed, anxiety
A memory from my childhood room, I was 5 years old:
I woke up feeling very groggy. I opened my eyes and was surrounded in darkness. The room was so pitch black that I couldn’t see anything around me. The night was deathly still, not even a breeze blowing. The temperature was stifling and the room smelled of my own sweat. The intimidating thick blackness around me forced me to stay in my blankets, it was a protective measure. I was feeling very anxious. I looked across the room to my window in anticipation of some light. I could make out the square frame of the window. Some light at least. Something wasn’t right. I looked at the window again and I could just make out the outline of something hanging in the window. I wanted to disappear. I wanted the power to make myself shrink smaller, I needed to hide. I held my breath as much as possible so as not to call any attention to myself. A metallic taste spread across the back of my tongue. I had to keep my eyes on the window. I could make out a rope hanging from the top of the window and a figure below it. I couldn’t panic yet. I strained my ears my ears if I could hear any sounds in the room. The sound of my short breaths magnified in my ears. I wanted to yell for my mother. I couldn’t. If some entity was in the room, it would find me.
I kept my eyes glued to the window – any sudden movements and I would run to my parent’s room. The blackness around me was thinning around me, my eyes were adjusting. I started to make out other objects in the room. Parallel to my bed, I could see the position where the door should be located, a slight frame and blackness. Below the window in front of me, some of my teddy bears and dolls were strewn around the flood. I couldn’t see this for sure but I had some recollection of leaving them there; I could just make out fuzzy objects lying around the floor in that area. There was a dresser to the right of the window, just before the door. I didn’t really want to look there…what if I caught a glimpse of something in the mirror, eyes…it felt like I was being watched. The texture of the blanket was feeling rough against my neck, my head felt light from the lack of breath.
A slight wave of relief swept over me. Another recollection from earlier in the day, my child sized bunny was left in the window and it was my skipping rope hanging from the top! My eyes and mind were now fully functional in the dark enclosure. Even with this realisation, I couldn’t bring my eyes to face that mirror, I could still sense a foreboding presence in the room…
We have 5 senses to interact with our surroundings. I like to think 6, feeling is also a sense. How often do we use them all? I’m currently doing a creative writing course and have been tasked to write using all 5 senses. I’m very used to using all 5 senses when I’m in “survival mode” – such as the above. It must be the adrenaline that kicks in, it causes everything to slow down and causes all my senses to come alive.
If I want to write using 5 senses, I need to start observing my environment using all 5 senses. Through trying to use 5 senses this week, I think I’ve discovered one of the best techniques at being present. Through out the day and going through various interactions, I would keep asking myself what I was sensing. It was a totally different experience. I became so much more present and the mundane suddenly transformed into being interesting…
Just driving in my car, I went through the motions:
I felt the sun rays on my skin.
I could see sunshine and beautiful green mountains around me framed by my old Toyota.
The slight smell of flowers around me (I was on a road with no cars).
I was feeling elated, almost heightened.
I was eating coconut chunks in the car, and the taste of this was still lingering in my mouth.
I could hear – Nikki and the Dove : Drummer. I had ear phones in ( This can be seen as enhancing or detracting from an experience – either way having music can change the whole dimension of the experience.)
Life on steroids!
#digiwrimo , #day11